From Pain to Peace: Meera Ishaya's Journey of Spiritual Transformation

What happens when you find yourself at the lowest point of your life and discover an unexpected pathway to peace and fulfillment? In this extraordinary episode of the Spiritual Spotlight Series, we connect with Meera Ishaya, an Ishaya monk, author, and meditation teacher, who shares her profound tale of transformation. 

From the depths of chronic pain and emotional turmoil, Meera reveals how a moment of utter despair led her to a life-changing experience of immense peace and stillness. Through her story, listeners will gain insights into the power of surrender and the impact of the Ishaya Ascension techniques in achieving a state of pure awareness.

We delve into Meera’s journey of mastering ascension techniques and the profound impact these practices had on her life. Our conversation touches on the limitations of traditional pain management and the mental and emotional struggles associated with chronic pain. Highlighting a poignant anecdote about Golden Gate Bridge survivors, we discuss the tragic impact of suicide and the pursuit of sustainable peace that transcends temporary highs. Together, we explore the balance between nurturing self-care and the relentless pursuit of peace, aiming to inspire listeners to seek alternative methods for relief and fulfillment.

The episode also explores the imbalance between masculine and feminine energies in our world, emphasizing the importance of nurturing qualities and inner journeys. Meera shares her perspective on cultivating inner awareness to create a harmonious outer life, drawing from her diverse roles as a mother, sister, wife, and lover of art and nature. We conclude by discussing the significance of authenticity in content creation, encouraging creators to embrace their true selves to connect and inspire others more deeply. Join us for a heartfelt conversation that promises to offer practical ways to cultivate presence, stability, and joy in your life.

To learn more about Meera:

Website: 

https://boundless-meditation.co.uk/

Books:

Peace or Pain: Discovering the unbroken you and changing your relationship with pain https://amzn.eu/d/4A385VG

Surrender is good for the Soul: The art of surrendering to gain fulfilment in life https://amzn.eu/d/8M0svpd

Peace or Pain Facebook Group

https://www.facebook.com/groups/699622521063173/?ref=share_group_link

Chapters

• 0:50 Transformative Journey to Spiritual Awakening
• 6:38 Surrendering to Overcome Pain
• 18:55 Exploring Feminine Energy and Inner Ascension
• 22:36 Journey to Inner Peace and Awareness
• 27:42 Authenticity in Being Visible

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:50

Hello everyone, welcome to Spiritual Spotlight Series. Today I am joined by Meera Ashaya. Meera is an Ashaya monk, author and meditation teacher who specializes in helping people go beyond pain and suffering to experience peace, joy, fulfillment and freedom. She has written two books Peace or Pain and Surrender is Good for the Soul. She also has a workbook the two-and-a-half a workbook to accompany Peace or Pain, soon to be published. Peace or Pain is a choice and she shows people this is impossible and how to make the choice. Surrender is a big part of the process because resistance causes suffering and, as a Shia monk, the Ascension techniques she practices take you beyond the thinking mind to the direct experience of pure awareness. Thank you so much for coming on the Spiritual Spotlight Series.

Speaker 2: 1:38

I'm so happy you're here. Thanks, Rachel. Yeah, it's wonderful to be here. I'm really excited to chat with you. I'm so excited.

Speaker 1: 1:43

So, Mira, you describe a transcendent experience that profoundly changed your life. Can you maybe share more about this moment and how it influenced?

Speaker 2: 1:55

your path in becoming a shy mom. Oh well, it was like the absolute foundation of it really. You know, I mean it's not really a happy story as such because, like I decided I didn't want to live anymore, so I was actually going to attempt to take my life. So, yeah, you probably weren't expecting that.

Speaker 1: 2:09

That's okay. I appreciate the vulnerability and the openness to share. Thank you.

Speaker 2: 2:14

Yeah, well, I think it's really important actually because, like so many people are suffering and I think, actually an awful lot of the, the remedy to that is to just be seen and heard, to just be able to be open, to discuss everything and not have to cause. I think that's one of the ways I got so stressed was like adjusting everything, everything I said, editing. I ever said, you know, and like trying to say the right thing and do the right thing, and it was exhausting, um, but really it was the long-term chronic pain I found myself in from a condition that I actually still have, um, and yeah, I just I couldn't do it anymore. You know, like, you can't even imagine how much pain I was in. There's probably some people out there who can, but you know, when people say, you know, uh, what's the pain levels? And it was like 10 out of 10, just it wasn't, you know, it's like 20 out of 10, you know like, and so, yeah, I just couldn't do it anymore and so, yeah, I couldn't walk properly either.

Speaker 2: 3:04

So I kind of was struggling along on crutches, um, yeah, and um, I I just dragged myself into the kitchen and and grabbed a knife and I was just going to cut my wrist, basically, but my husband caught me. He saw me, thankfully, and yeah, he was holding a young son in his arms I can't remember how old, he was two, three, something like that and yeah, he was obviously trying to talk me down, but I was just like done, I was just done. I was just like I couldn't do it anymore. I was in so much pain, I was just done. I was just like I couldn't do it anymore. I was in so much pain, I just felt like nobody cared. And I mean, that wasn't true, but that's what it felt like, because something had just happened, was disrespectful to me, which actually got remedied through, you know, realising how seriously I was done and was on. You know, like you know, when you get so overwhelmed and you're on maximum and one tiny thing just tips you over the edge, well, it was like that really. And so in that moment, yeah, it was like the worst moment of my life and it still is the worst and nothing's ever gotten lower now.

Speaker 2: 4:03

It was my lowest point, but in that moment, I think, because I just so completely was done, there was a level of surrender in there, you know. And then my son made this, this like little gurgle sound in his throat and my eyes just flicked up straight into his eyes and then it was just like the whole earth stood still, time stood still, and it was just like it just transported me into this immense, peaceful, endless. You know, it was just like there was just nothing, it was a nothingness, but it was just so serene and still yet vast and expansive and, yeah, it was just endless peace in that moment and, yeah, I'd never experienced anything like it. You know, like you talk about wanting peace and quiet, but this was like there was just no boundaries to the experience and and yeah, it was just incredible and my husband saw, you know, that my experience had utterly changed. You know as quickly as he dared grab the knife off me. But I, just at that point, didn't care because I was just so, so, serene and still, and it was just like a joy in there as well, like it's just like, you know, everything you could ever want all rolled into one experience that you couldn't. That's why I call it transcendent, because it's just like you can't describe it even. Actually, it was an indescribable experience and, you know, for me, even when that started to fade a little bit. It's just like, wow, you know, like I can have this now at my lowest, lowest point in my life, then pretty sure I could probably find that, you know, in everyday life.

Speaker 2: 5:39

And so really that kind of became the opening point of a journey of exploration to go right, what was that and how do I replicate it? You know, maybe even like 50 percent, you know is pretty cool and that's what I did. And and, yeah, shortly after that I found the Ashayas and that was really the, the beginning of my life again, um, letting me realize and know, by demonstrating it from their own experience, what was possible. And I could see it in their eyes and I'm like I don't know what that is, but but you know, I kind of do and I could see it in their eyes and I'm like I don't know what that is, but but but you know, I kind of do and I want that, and so, yeah, I just went for it with all my heart, and I still do.

Speaker 2: 6:18

I'm a practitioner and I'm still as excited now as I was when I first realized that there was hope, that there was another way. I didn't have to live a life of suffering and nobody does and I kind of want to let other people know that and and and, not just as a theory but as a direct, you know, living experience. That's what you know. Learning the ascension techniques has given me and everyone I teach, with or without those techniques, actually to actually access your natural operating mode. So it's like you have two operating modes in a way. Most of us are just in the thinking operating mode, but there's just one of presence, yeah, and how long ago was that?

Speaker 2: 6:58

So that experience well, my son's 20. Oh, so it was quite a while ago, a long, long time ago. Yeah, so that happened. Yeah, so, let's say 17 years ago, something like that. Yeah, so, let's say 17 years ago, something like that. Um, and then it was in 2010 that I found, I found the Ashayas. So, yeah, it was a few years, it wasn't straight away that I found it, but you know, when you kind of just you start finding things and it's thing off and just you know, one experience opens up into another, into another, and it was kind of like that really, and and I think I found the Ashayas at the in time where I'm like I had these amazing workshops I was going to, but they were kind of like great, but they never lasted. So I was looking for the tangible experience to access, you know, moment by moment in your everyday life, rather than just a lovely weekend, great recharges of batteries, but I want that in every moment. I'm greedy.

Speaker 1: 7:56

No, I think it's really beautiful that you know, in that moment of having this, like, okay, I'm ready to tap out, I'm done. And then you found this sense of to surrender to whatever you know force that was coming into you, to this piece, and I love that your husband was there with you and your son was there with you. And then it's like, okay, I want to. And then it's like you, you found these moments and then find the Ashayas and then write your books and everything else that you're doing. Like I just think that's it's so amazing. And and to share a personal story with you is that I wish that you know my brother committed suicide about eight, nine years ago, eight years ago, and I wish that he had this moment of clarity before that actually happened, because I do think people kind of they zone out, I don't think they're aware of what they're doing, you know.

Speaker 2: 8:48

So sorry, that was off topic, I just wanted to know it's not, it's not, it's on topic isn just wanted to. No, I mean, it's not, it's not, it's on topic, isn't it really? You know, I did so now. Yeah, I did so now. I mean, you know, I, in some respects, am I just lucky, I don't know. Um, I heard a story about suicide once.

Speaker 2: 9:04

I think it was an article in the magazine um about people jumping off the golden gate bridge. Yes, um, and there was a small percentage that survive it. And I remember reading it and thinking do they survive it because they changed their mind? Because it was the article saying everyone that survived it said the minute they let go, they changed their mind. Yes, and I've seen that myself. Yeah, they survived, they changed their mind. Or are they lucky? And everyone changes their mind, you know? And I just remember thinking that and I actually phoned up a friend because I was just like I had to tell her she was actually going to commit suicide that day.

Speaker 2: 9:39

My friend and I didn't even realize but, and what am I doing? I'm going to talk to her about suicide. Um, but you know, she's very much like no, you've got to talk about it. You talking about it is what saved my life, because you told me that and that you know that just stopped her in her tracks, and, and so that's why I think it is important to to think about right, it's not just physical, it's mental and emotional, and I think it's the mental and emotional component of physical pain that is more debilitating than actually the physical pain.

Speaker 2: 10:11

That's, that's my experience.

Speaker 1: 10:12

I would 100% agree with you and I think also people that suffer from chronic pain. It's an invisible illness and people don't truly understand how much pain someone truly is in and from your experience and me being a registered nurse and having a pain management background, it definitely you can see someone who looks able-bodied, is speaking with you, everything, and they are in the most horrific pain of their life. And then they're judged and I would imagine you probably experienced having judgment and probably isolation in this journey of you know. Now you're out of I hope you're out of a lot of this pain, but it feels like when somebody's in that it's got to be so horrific to not be validated for what you're going through and also we have so many limitations in the medical field for treating pain. I don't know if you've witnessed that yourself, but here in the United States it's narcotics which then you're judged as a junkie. Here in the United States it's narcotics which then you're judged as a junkie. No-transcript. Is that something you've witnessed yourself?

Speaker 2: 11:21

probably yeah, well, I mean, I actually I'm very lucky that I couldn't tolerate morphine. Um, it worked like magic the first time, you know, and pretty much raised most of the pain, so I was like great. The second time I took it, I couldn't move off my bed like I was totally debilitated, so I'm really glad that that happened actually. So I didn't go in down that route, because I've seen other people go down that route and it is it's just like a slippery slope to higher and higher doses, uh, which actually stop, uh, masking the pain enough or reducing the pain levels enough, and so you're still taking them in that hope, you know, for that first time when you take them and it feels amazing and, and so I'm very glad that that didn't work for me and that's that pushed me, though it pushed me to find other ways, you know, and one of the ways was drumming.

Speaker 2: 12:08

Strangely, I remember, you know, doing some shamanic workshops and I turned, I was, I bought this massive 22 inch buffalo drum, you know, for vision quests, and you know it's very hypnotic and soothing, and so I was just playing the drum and then my, it was heavy because it was 22 inches. I've since got a smaller one, um, and I just remember shifting the position. So I was now drumming on myself and the pain across my pelvic area just went and I'm just like, oh my god, this is amazing, and you know so sound, sound therapy can be very helpful.

Speaker 1: 12:39

Amazing, yeah. So in some of your teachings you emphasize the role of surrendering and overcoming pain. How do you define surrender and why is it so crucial in managing both physical and emotional pain?

Speaker 2: 12:54

it's so crucial because you are, you're getting, you're stepping out of what we've we've learned to do is we've become very resistant to everything. You know from very early on. I think it kind of happens with emotions more than anything, like young children have big emotions and it's like calm down, you know, or don't cry, don't cry, and we just like never allowed to actually just process and feel the way we're feeling, um. And so for me, what I've discovered through exploring with my long-term chronic pain and then when I had broken ribs um a few years ago, um, I then explored with the acute pain, like, so now, like, I'm actually damaged and broken you know it was acute pain now, um, but I actually got to the point where I I accessed a different operating mode.

Speaker 2: 13:41

I've already touched on that presence. When you are completely present, there is no voice in your head telling you how to experience your body. So we experience our body and our world through what our thoughts tell us and it's like we're in a, in a theater, or have a virtual reality headset on, and that is how we experience life. That's a very distorted version of life. So presence actually is a very clear, pure experience of life, and so when you access that, you have a pure experience of your body. All suffering goes, there is no suffering and, and ultimately, there's no pain either. Pain doesn't tell you something. You happen in, that happens in the present moment. There has to be, you know, thinking, and you can't think and be present. You're either in the past or the future, and so you have a very friction, pressure field experience. You know resisting. That's why I wrote the book about surrender as well, because that really is the, the, the crutch of it. You know of the whole experience and if, if you're, if you're surrendering as well too, it's not to something separate from you, it's, it's like the bigger you. You might call it god or the universe or higher self or whatever you actually want to label it, it doesn't matter.

Speaker 2: 15:00

But there's a greater experience of yourself, without the mind, without any thoughts there, and that, for me, has been the heart of changing my experience with pain.

Speaker 2: 15:14

So I'm not in, I still have the condition, yet I don't have the levels of pain and I have much more mobility, which is increasing and improving almost daily at the moment, as I'm stripping away all the concepts and the beliefs and the emotions and all the stress I've taken on over the years and years of the fight and flight response, you know, is all just releasing and, within that, a strength is returning to my body, but also a flexibility, a pliability you know that I haven't had for a long time, and so it's fascinating and continues to fascinate me.

Speaker 2: 15:51

You know, like what is possible, how, and this including, from you know, improving eyesight and like across everything. Yeah, I'm absolutely, you know, so excited in a way, actually actually to see what else is possible, even though currently I'm not in any pain and my life is very, very easy, um, delightful actually, like it's like I'm on holiday day in, day out, and and like that's everybody's birthright. This is just not, I'm not special. This is something that everybody can access, and that that's what I like to help people do, you know, not just talk about it but actually go right. Here's some techniques, use these and you can access that too, you know.

Speaker 1: 16:34

That was a beautiful answer and thank you. I'm so excited. So in one of your books, Peace or Pain, you explore the concept that peace or pain is a choice. Can you elaborate on how individuals can consciously make that choice?

Speaker 2: 16:50

Yeah, so the choice whether it's peace or pain in a moment, a lot of it is. You have to unpack how you're making the choice for pain, because it's unconscious. We don't realize what we are doing. We don't realize there's resistance, that we've learned to resist everything and and, like I said, resistant causes suffering and a lot of what we call pain is actually just the secondary experience of suffering. It's a reaction. So that's where it becomes a choice. Once you start to recognize that, you can choose again, and then you have the pure experience of your body and so, like when I had broken ribs, for example, I could still feel the sight of the broken ribs. It was a sensation, but it was neither good nor bad, like it could just be there. I didn't need it to go to experience peace. I could experience peace now and then that's kind of like the blueprint for your body healing a lot faster. Yeah.

Speaker 1: 17:47

I love that. I just love it. I'm so excited. I know someone who, personally, is going through a pain journey and how she experienced an injury and just watching her go through it, it's like I'm going to have to purchase your book and give it to her, because there have been moments where and it's somebody's daughter where she like she doesn't want to live anymore. She can barely walk. She's now getting lidocaine infusions and she's somebody like yourself who doesn't tolerate narcotics and not that I'm saying that that's the answer for pain, because I'm not, but I'm going to have to get your book. I'm going to have to get your book. Give it to her Because I love it. It's a choice. I like that. It's it's a choice.

Speaker 1: 18:36

I'm a firm believer that the body keeps the score and that everything that happens to us gets embedded into our cellular tissue. And how you choose to move forward with that is you know it's going to change your life dramatically. So let me ask you this so in your other books Surrender is Good for the Soul you explore concepts like the divine, feminine and cosmic exploration. How do these elements play a role in achieving fulfillment in life?

Speaker 2: 18:55

yeah. So, um, we live in still a quite masculine orientated world, and I don't mean men, but women here. I I mean like the masculine traits, you know, like the, the forcefulness, the linear, logical, you know, go, go, go, go go, but the feminine is like the compass. So if you think of it as a boat, you know the masculine energy is the engine and the feminine energy is the rudder, and of course we're missing the rudder to direct that masculine energy in the right direction, in the direction that serves something. So for me, the feminine energy, the right direction, in the direction that serves something. So for me, the feminine energy, the receptive energy, the open, nurturing energy, is sorely lacking at the moment in the world.

Speaker 2: 19:39

And I think when we start to look at ourselves and put ourselves first, it's not selfish to put yourself first. You can't give from a dry well. You have to look after yourself and actually the more you look after yourself and your own experience, the more you can give. You have to look after yourself and actually the more you look after yourself and your own experience, the more you can give. Like, I'm a very giving person, but I was kind of like, you know, when you like treading water and you really are half sinking and you're barely keeping your head above water. It was like that. You know you can't give from that. I did, I did. You know you kind of do, and even as a mom, you're always giving, giving, giving. But what I've done now is I nurture my own experience, first and foremost, and then that actually allows me to give more, and I think that's really, really important. So that was the feminine aspect.

Speaker 2: 20:20

The cosmic exploration is the changing your relationship from the inside out. So, rather than going exploring the Himalayas on the outside as a spiritual exploration, mine's an inner one so you come back into the heart of self, into the pure experience of presence, and really cultivate that, because that is the foundation from for everything, really, because you just have a completely different experience of life. You know it's free now, it's joyful now and it's stable. So then you can give, you can stay in that without having to do anything, because it's now a stable state of being, rather than you know we are human beings, aren't we, after all? Rather than human doings.

Speaker 2: 21:05

But you know, we have this horrible sense of a doer that's responsible and has to yeah, get it right, which is founded on the belief that there's something wrong, you know, and so that's one of the chapters in that book about my surrender book is the idea that there's something wrong and when you live by that belief, all you see is wrongness. You feel wrongness, you know. But when you take that idea of wrongness out of any situation, even something really dysfunctional, it becomes empowering and you get creative. You know, you're not now thinking about how to fix it and make it right, you're just looking at everything you know brand new, fresh, in this moment, and then you get really creative and then solutions almost just come to you. You know like you magnetize solutions by by the, the creativity of letting go of you. You know like you magnetize solutions by the creativity of letting go of the being. You know anything wrong in any situation.

Speaker 1: 21:58

And you brought up such a valuable point that really for a lot of the answers that we're seeking, we need to go with that, that we don't necessarily have to have an external experience to find the answers or to shift our life or to really find peace. It's all within. Was that something that you experienced in your journey of maybe looking at things from an outward experience to now going within? And I know you also teach of ascension techniques. I would imagine part of that is also going within. Can you maybe elaborate a little bit on that?

Speaker 2: 22:30

yeah, so, um, ascension is a teaching, it's the teaching of the one, and so, yeah, it's an inward journey. Yeah, and I kind of relate sometimes awareness to you know, like eyesight, in order to have a clear point of focus with your eyesight, you need a strong peripheral vision. And it's the same with awareness in order to have a, you know, a clear focus, uh, in this moment, to know what serves best and what doesn't serve best, and to have that peace, you need a strong peripheral awareness. And and so, yeah, it's an in in a journey. And when you cultivate that inner state of being, it mirrors on the outside.

Speaker 2: 23:09

So, like to try and change stuff on the outside, it's only ever going to be. Everything's changing, it's flux and change. You sort something out, and then it goes wrong over here and you sort that out and it goes, you know, and you're forever doing that, whereas if you nurture your inner state, then the outer state matches it. So it's, it's sustainable, it's easy. Um, and, yeah, for me, the ascension techniques have been amazing, because that's what they do is the mechanical techniques, and they're just like, just bring your attention back inwards. So you haven't gotta, you know, try to be still, try to be present. It's just like it's doing it and rinse and repeat, and then it's, like you know, going to the gym, but for awareness or an awareness model and and then, and then it gets really strong and then you, just you stay here, you stay present.

Speaker 1: 23:58

I love that. I love that. So how has your background as a mother, sister, wife and lover of art and nature influence your approach to spirituality and meditation?

Speaker 2: 24:08

it, or creativity is everything you know, and again, the source of creativity is within. But for me, I think it's that that joy for for living. Again, you know, like I've, I've always loved reading books, um, and gardening was something that I developed actually over time. Um, I think I resisted it for a while because my mum loved gardening, and you know how you just never, you just don't want to end up like your mum towards my sister.

Speaker 1: 24:32

I'm like, oh, you're a professional gardener but it's so funny.

Speaker 2: 24:37

But that's what I started to recognize from journeying within and really getting to know myself, is that, like I don't have to cut off my nose to spite my face, I can actually do the things I love doing, um, and not try and avoid something, because it reminds me of, you know something, the controlling element of parents, you know, and when I became a parent and I became controlling and it's just like, oh no, I swore I never would, but it's kind of unpacks that, that relationship dynamic that you kind of get locked into, relationship dynamic that you kind of get locked into. It's like a tangled web, isn't it? And? And presence enables you to kind of dismantle all of that to see beyond. It's like it's a hologram, it's not as real as it appears to be, and so everything, just it gets really clear, um and and so, yeah, you step out of those patterns so you don't end up like your parents, you know, not in a good way or a bad way even, but you're individual.

Speaker 2: 25:34

You just get to be yourself because, like you don't want to be like your parents, they're not really being themselves, they're actually, you know, they're just being their learned habits and behaviors, and so, yeah, that's what you don't want and that's what ascension has given me the ability to step out of that. So I'm free to be me, um, and you know, and then it's, it's just so. It's so liberating and so joyful, um, and I just want other people to know that, like I always kind of used to hate it when people used to say, oh, I'm, I'm blissed out, because it can be sounded a little bit like almost happy clappy, like not fake as such, but it wasn't a tangible, rock-solid experience that I could hear and see in the people talking like that, whereas this for me, is like a very quiet joy, you know, a very peaceful joy, but one that's exciting and enlivening and yeah, who wouldn't want that?

Speaker 1: 26:35

that's a beautiful answer. Before I ask you the last question if anyone's interested in learning more about you, where is the best place for them to go to?

Speaker 2: 26:44

uh, yeah, so probably my website, um, which is boundless-meditationcouk, and there are links there to my youtube channel, which is just mirror ashaya, if you want to look up that, because I've got, uh, quite a lot of video shorts that I'm releasing each week and some guided meditations, um, and there's also a peace or pain facebook group, but you can kind of find all of the links for that on my on my website, so that you can actually, yeah, hear more, find out more, get my books. If you want to buy a copy um, the uh, the workbook and guide, the journal to go with my first books, um been published now since, since I sent that information to you, so that's available on amazon as well I love that.

Speaker 1: 27:25

So, as someone who has been featured in many podcasts and created substantial online presence, what have you found to be most effective way to connect with and inspire your audience?

Speaker 2: 27:37

just to be real. Actually, you know, it's like the video shorts I've been recording. I I do record them as opposed to do lives, but I record them and however they turn out, is is what goes. So for me, I don't want a polished image. It just doesn't connect with me. So if it doesn't make sense to me, it doesn't feel heartfelt to me, then I can't see how that's going to be heartfelt to anyone else. And so I think for me, rather than just trying to sell yourself, just be yourself and then just be visible. So yeah, that's's for me.

Speaker 1: 28:13

I like that being your authentic version of yourself, being okay to be yourself. I love that. That's a great answer, mira, thank you so much for coming to the Spiritual Spotlight series. It honestly was a pleasure to speak with you today. Thank you so much.